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Broke and cranky at a job I hate

There was a day, before The Pleasure Revolution.
An ordinary “plain old, plain old” before the Womanly Arts.
When I had been working at my “bridge job” for about 10 years too long. You know a bridge job. It’s that job you take that you don’t really invest yourself in, because your plan is not to stay there very long, because your plan is to move on to bigger or better things, but you kind of find yourself not moving on to bigger or better things for a really, really, really long time.
It was a very long bridge, this bridge.
And, basically, it went nowhere.
Nowhere that I wanted to be.

And the longer I was on this bridge, the more cranky I felt, the more irritated I became, the more I felt like…jumping off.
What kind of co-worker do you think that made me?
Not a chance.
Pleasant to be with?
Not so much.
Perpetually irritated was more like it.
Up for advancement?
No way. The last thing I wanted was to be identified as “good”—because getting a promotion meant this bridge job was my career, and that was the last thing that this “High and Holy Highness of Perpetual Irritation” desired.

What did I want?
I wanted to live my passion, to live my voice in the world, to contribute, to be of service, to make change, and to make a fortune.
This was never going to happen at the restaurant I was working in.
What did make the change for me?
One simple thing.
Which was the last thing in the world I felt like doing.
But it’s the only thing that ever works.
And this is something that I still do, every day of my life.
What is it?
I will tell you later.
Just kidding.
I am going to tell you now. Really.

It’s actually very simple—you don’t have to change anything about your outer circumstances. But if you do this thing that I am going to tell you—with your whole heart and soul—everything will change.
What I began to do was to live my passion, and lunge for my desires, right here, and right now—no matter the circumstances.
I began to care passionately about my job.
And the people I worked with, and for.
I became the best at what I did, and enjoyed the hell out of it.
I loved seducing cranky customers and making them happy.
I loved taking great care of the boss and the manager, and seeing how I could contribute to making everything work better.
I created community and fun with my co-workers.

Well, I was exhausted from playing small.
It was eating away at my body and soul.
So, I decided to live my passion, right there, where I was.
Just for the fun of it.
And soon I wasn’t working in a restaurant anymore.
My passion moved me on, to the next opportunity, which led to the next, and the next, and so on, which led, eventually, to the creation of The School of Womanly Arts.
Your passion is your power.
Yeah, you got that right.
Living your passion is living your divinity.
And you can do that today.
Bridge job or not.

So, what I want to know from you—right here, and right now—is this:
On a scale of 1-10, how much do you connect with your passion on a daily basis?
How do you live you passion while you are still at your version of a bridge job?
Have you ever found yourself in that desperate place of feeling like the temporary job you have has become way too permanent?
What do you do to connect with your passion in the midst of a work slump?
Let me know in the comments below.

And if you want to help another woman live her passion, please share this blog on Facebook, Twitter, email, etc.

With so much love and pleasure,
Mama Gena

P.S. Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp is your training ground for uncorking your passion and exploding it on the world. If you want the chance to talk with me one-on-one about this, stay tuned for an announcement this Thursday….

P.P.S. Have you been taking advantage of my free video series, designed to amp up your passion in the here and now? I’ll be rolling out the third video next week, but you can catch up on the first two here:

Video One: Start getting what you want NOW
Video Two: What your mama never told you

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55 Comments / Leave a Comment

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  • Jenda February 6, 2013, 9:26 pm

    I am a Supervisor/Hostess at a small restuarant in Cambridge, MA. This blog was so dead on the head of the nail that I felt like I was the one writing it. I have tried to make the best out of my job. Meeting new people everyday and getting to speak with them and make them smile is probably one of the best feelings in the world. Although, the back end of my position is awful. The staff here are incompetent and miserable. I come in to work every shift in the best mood and I end up leaving with a morale at my all time lowest. It wasn’t until I read Mama Gena’s book, Operator’s Guide to Men, 2 years ago, when I felt so incredible about myself. Passions are such a difficult thing to find, but I think every one has one, all they have to be is patient and continue to do the things they love in the meantime.

  • Kimberly September 3, 2012, 8:13 pm

    Thank you for this article. I shared it with my younger sister who works at a top insurance firm, in sales. She absolutely loathes her job. I too had a monumental breakdown with my “bridge” job in financial services (6 years). Although, I have to say -I did put my heart and soul into the job (which does make a huge difference).. I even thought I liked it at times, but I always knew it was never going to bring me 100% satisfaction. Just 6 months ago, I left NYC and moved to Sydney, Australia. Best decision of my life. I am still looking for my dream job, but in the meantime I have found love, quality of life and pure happines…

  • jj August 18, 2012, 11:17 am

    My passion is to play devils advocate for the voice that speaks up to contest the almighty MG. To say what works for one woman doesn’t necessarily work for others and that its irresponsible to generalize “the way” being one technique that is the “only thing that ever works”.
    In my experience of using the Womanly Arts, I have found that there is so much information that isn’t available unless you take the course. Maybe I’m poopooing things out of a less than fulfilled place right now, but that is where I am despite or as a less than satisfactory result of following the processes outlined in your book. I have found that without community, or the ability to create a community of support with other women it is a path that ends in disaster and dissapointment with the realization that the “sister goddesshood support is only available for 29.95 a month or the investment of 1,000’s of $’s. That doesn’t ring of divinity to me as a compassionate desire for all women to be enlightened and educated regarding their true nature as the magnetic magnificent powerful creatures that they are. Healing that place in women, with the ultimate outcome of healing the planetary conciousness wounded by the imbalance of the all male paradigm inflicted on us, is as individual and as sacred as each and every pussy is.
    Your work has opened a door for many women, but are you leading the way through that door out of compassion so that every woman, regardless or where she is at can walk in, or as long as there is profit in it for you with class enrollment.

  • SG Ssanyu August 7, 2012, 11:06 am

    Thank you for this post. I’ve been working at my “bridge job” as a restaurant server for two years too long. I just found out that I’m pregnant and Im feeling the urgency to move onto a position somewhere less physically taxing. I desire to triple my income and to work in a career that I feel joy for and appreciation from. I have learned so much through this job, about people and about myself. I met my partner and the father of my unborn child at this job as well. I no longer am content playing small and desire to expand upward and outward.

    • Araceli November 17, 2012, 4:57 am

      Misty: I love reading your thuothgs. You are a good writer…has anyone ever told you that? You have a great way of putting words to your observations and feelings. That is a gift. You should probably write lyrics for a country song or something 🙂

  • GiGi August 3, 2012, 12:15 am

    Mama … you are so on the money with this one … thanks so much … this is the validation I needed. My bridge job has at times felt way to permanent… but I’ve got your number Sister … and I started working this routine … I’m going to rock the shipbuilding world no matter what 🙂 . One of my favorite ways to connect to my passion is to listen to Barry Whites Greatest Hits on the way in … !!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 … try it .. it’s A-mazing. XOXOM

  • Katrina August 2, 2012, 1:28 pm

    Thank You MaMa Gena. This is Sister Katrina (I had the dream a few months ago about putting dents in this mean girl’s Ferrari with my heels!) This blog post really sparked my interest. If any other Sisters could help me know what to do on the inside to just manifest a job. I have been out of college for a year and have applied to several jobs at a University. While I know this isn’t what I really want as a career, I think it will help me to obtain what I want to really do and I really want some benefits right now too. I feel so lost right now.

  • Kate August 2, 2012, 2:41 am

    Thankyou Mama Gena. I am currently my mum’s carer and, truth be told, I am sitting upstairs avoiding her at the moment because I simply feel so resentful and angry at both her and myself for being stuck here. So far, attempts I have made to work from home haven’t worked, though I am starting something new and pushing harder so I am able to pursue my dream of moving from where we are. I’m sick of pretending to be happy in front of everybody when the reality is I feel like life is slipping through my fingers, and I feel so dreadfully unhappy. Lately, the only joy I have felt is when I am alone. I am going to try to bring more passion into where I am now. I am worn out from pushing so hard and being cranky all the time. It’s time to go back downstairs and try and find the passion in where I am. Thankyou for reminding me to check my perspective.

  • Caroline Phipps August 1, 2012, 10:27 am

    I met Emmy Award winning filmmaker & writer Dennis Watlington in 2007 after attending a night with Mama Gena. Basically the orientation had given me the courage to speak to him in the supermarket. We became a couple and in June of last year – he suffered multiple strokes that left him almost totally paralyzed and barely able to speak. With the inspiration of Mama – get groovy in the place you are – I instituted a policy of “love is all around us and everywhere we go…” The upshot is that just over a year later – Dennis is learning how to walk and can speak, read, etc almost perfectly. The story has so inspired others that we’ve been joined by award winning filmmakers who are making the documentary of his life and recovery – Dennis is taking an active part in the process even though he’s still in rehab. I’m now producing my 1st film! We’re also writing the book together. Thank you Mama for ALL of your great wisdom. We feel so blessed to have you in our lives…

  • Rhea August 1, 2012, 5:57 am

    Again, just exactly what I need – I am looking for a bridge job right now, and it scares the s**t out of me, because I am scared that it will drain my soul and energy, especially since all I want is to focus on my art.
    Thank you so much for the reminder!!!

  • Deborah Smith August 1, 2012, 12:40 am

    Dear Mama G,
    Ahhh, here is where I have been fortunate, somehow I have always managed to do this. Maybe it’s the Gemini in me: so easy to be passionate about lots of things. And, I loved seeing you write about this.


  • Adrienne July 31, 2012, 10:31 pm

    I’m so excited! In 2006, I contacted you because Mastery was ordering 300 copies of As A Woman Thinketh by Florence Scovell Shinn, from our publishing company…where I was the poster child for pushing really hard to create a quality experience in an unfriendly environment. Really, a metaphysical publisher was having workplace stagnation, and everything I did to perk things up just bounced back with a pissy spin. So, I rolled high and spent many month’s of future income to take a big step up – and enrolled for Mastery! It was a decisive step for me to walk in the direction of my dreams.

    And now, I can announce that Part One of my Great American Metaphysical Novel has been e-published on Amazon this week! It took 5 years, but with the pleasure tools at my disposal, I just kept reaching for joy and pleasure and transformed my life in the interim. You’re never alone when you walk with pleasure – and you take everyone else with you!

    Thank you, Regena!

  • Jessica Johnson July 31, 2012, 8:46 pm

    When I saw the title in my inbox I swear I thought you had read my swamp!!! I too am trying t make the best of where I am because I do realize that whatever my true thoughts and intentions are…….is EXACTLY what I will get. I’m trying to get back on track and be in pleasure more.

  • SG Vulvanica July 31, 2012, 8:46 pm

    “What is it?
    I will tell you later.
    Just kidding.”

    Reg I read this at a coffeehouse and I laughed so hard my laughter echoed throughout the building! I love it.

    “So, I decided to live my passion, right there, where I was.
    Just for the fun of it.”

    YES! Right on, sister. I’m loving that and working it, right here in Vulvanic-Utah.

  • Caroline July 31, 2012, 4:47 pm

    Whooow, this blog just pushed to all my “want to live my passion” things. I so much want to do it, and I am so close to doing it. But it scares me to leave my job and to choose my passion. I know how much I earn, I know I am good at my job and I feel safe. What if I get poor, if I cannot figure out how to live my passion, if this and this and that? I pray for strength to change the things I can. Thanks for this blog!
    I am moving in the right direction – THAAAANKS!!!!

    • regena July 31, 2012, 5:54 pm

      when you make the leap- the wings appear, sister!!

  • Marilyn July 31, 2012, 2:36 pm

    This is great! I’m in a weird place though in that I’m living my passion, but it isn’t paying the bills yet and I’m seeking more work to create more abundance. Should be interesting!

  • Julie July 31, 2012, 2:16 pm

    Wow! I made this exact shift about two months ago…it really has changed my life in some really awesome ways. I LOVE coming to work and I love the people I work for. If nothing ever changes (a new or “better” job) it would still be a wonderful job (life!). I do love my life!!! : )

  • Pia July 31, 2012, 2:11 pm

    Thank you for this blog. I am a teacher for students with severe disabilities/Autism. I decided to change my attitude and perspective about my job several months ago. I show everyone love by silently wishing them well, seeing them surrounded by light, and imagining myself as the healer of all negativity. It has definitely helped. My higher unfolding is taking place. I just finished a teacher training to be a yoga instructor and I find so much passion in offering free classes and being of service through yoga, as I continue teaching students with special needs. I am not sure what the future holds and that’s OK because I trust something higher has my back. In that trust I can cultivate bliss, beauty, and abundance. xo

  • Wildcherry July 31, 2012, 1:53 pm

    I’d be fibbin’ if I rated myself at 10 already BUT I can say that I KNOW WHAT THE PLEASURE OF 10 FEELS LIKE which gives me my get-up-‘n-go every pleasure researching second.
    It’s such a joy feeling my temperature rising from a lukewarm 2 or 3 to a smoking hot 9’er!
    Kisses beautiful Mama Gena… Fantastic as always.

  • Leigh July 31, 2012, 1:24 pm

    Thank you for this most timely message. I sometimes get so focused on what’s not working that I just create more of it and forget to focus on what is working. Living my passion every day exactly where I am at is living the gratitude that I have for my life. Just as love is a verb, being grateful is more than a just a feeling. I am learning from you day by day, Mama Gena, that finding my pleasure is most times taking pleasure in right where I am–in the sun on my skin, in the breeze through my hair, in the laughter of my child, or the scent of my favorite perfume, or even the spices I use making dinner.

    • mama gena July 31, 2012, 1:33 pm

      thank YOU for responding, leigh!! what a pleasure!

  • SG "RevP." La Tonia July 31, 2012, 12:39 pm

    So, DAMN, Regena what are your doing eaves-dropping in Spring Cleaning sessions, astro traveling into living rooms or you are that Divine to speak to the rumbles in our. . .no, let me own this… MY bush? You’re good Chief Moma! I confess it’s hard to give myself passionately to this place. I confess the disappointment with the bridge not even being secure. And, even more deeply, I confess I already know the principle and power of your reminder. May I protest it for a moment more? I gotta get myself together to “implement”, “actualize” and “be it”. It feels like I’m accepting. LOL!!! Okay, I’m such a stubborn Sister Goddess, eh? I want what I want.

  • Kiki July 31, 2012, 12:36 pm

    Thank you Mama Gena. I am in a bridge internship right now. It’s like being in a bad relationship– there are things I like about it, but some days my bosses’ words sting so much I just want to walk out. I am interviewing for other jobs, but until I find one, I know the best thing I can do is appreciate the things I do like and give less attention to the things I don’t care for.

  • Susannam July 31, 2012, 12:25 pm

    Oh Mama Gena…

    I’m in a same bridge job – waiting tables and hating it…
    Thank you for this, I was nearly in tears reading it.

  • Luxurious Laurie July 31, 2012, 11:39 am

    I couldn’t agree more. This works. I am grateful for my wonderful life and my desires are fulfilled. So much love and joy, I am bursting with appreciation for it all. Xoxo

  • Joni Lowe July 31, 2012, 11:25 am

    Thank you Mama. I’m the party, right?

    This is a great reminder.

    I LOVE how you share with us where you’ve come from. It’s so easy to relate to it.

    Hip rollin’ love,

  • Jen Sparkles July 31, 2012, 10:59 am

    Thank you so much for this reminder, Mama! I’ve been following you for several years. I first discovered your books in 2003/04. Your one book literally jumped out at me while I was browsing through the aisles at Borders! I devoured all three, and they changed my life.
    I’ve been following your videos and enews lately, and am so inspired.
    This was a great message. I’ve been cranky (but trying to bring in doses of pleasure throughout the day), wanting to leave my job to be a stay-at-home mom, but can’t afford it. This reminds me to be happy right here, right now, and make the most of it (in a pleasurable way)! I am excited about good things and changes to come :).

  • Cheryl Teichroeb July 31, 2012, 10:37 am

    THANK YOU MAMA!!!! You are a GENIUS! Such a beautiful way to live in the NOW, with no excuses!!!
    With so much gratitude,

  • mila July 31, 2012, 10:17 am

    Dear Mama Gena,
    I can’t believe when I read this blog today: I am at my permanent bridge job, which pays my bills. I know what I am doing but everybody else in the office is half my age, I am 54 and think that I am not as good with technololgy as they are which made me misrable and cranky. So what did I do? I followed you advice: the office atmoshere is very casual and the girls are wearing shorts etc, so I dress fabulous and wear nice shoes and pearls and makeup which made me much happier person! And both bosses noticed and now they call me “movie star”. You are so right!

    Thank you for giving me an opportunity to follow your blog and read your books, I have read all of them a few times.

    SG Mila

  • Mary July 31, 2012, 10:12 am

    I brag I am a 10! After studying at the School of Womanly Arts, every single day I live my passion. My job, my marriage, my sensuality. As my best SG friend and I like so say “We live like the plane is going down!” Yeah!

  • Olivia Lane July 31, 2012, 10:11 am

    Mama Gena, thank you for sharing this. As someone who hasn’t worked in 3 1/2 months and has been unemployed for longer in the past, I can say it’s not up to our jobs to give us pleasure. Our jobs also don’t take away our pleasure. I totally agree that we have the power and the choice to live in passion exactly in the circumstances we are presently in.

    I connect with passion at a 9 on a scale up to 10, especially since I started drawing every day. I feel like there is always room for me to wiggle in more fun: reach out a little more to others, give myself extra time to get places so I can literally smell the flowers and take more pictures. Thanks for the reminder to do this. Big hugs!

  • Chantal July 31, 2012, 9:51 am

    hou !! Right on the nail Mama. I have no Bridge job…but a bridge health condition…Chronical fatigue…It’s been 10 years…10 years on passion pause…telling myself it is no use to dream or desire…since I don’t have the energy to DO things….

    well it never occured to me that I could live my helth condition as if it was wonderful AND put all my passion in it.

    I sure will give it a try starting this very minute !!

    Cheers Mama you rock! and so will I !!!

  • MaryAnn Fry July 31, 2012, 9:38 am

    Bravo. Bravo. Bravo. Thank you for reminding me. It’s all an inside job.

  • Chris July 31, 2012, 9:28 am

    I SOOO needed to read this TODAY! I recently graduated with a master’s degree and have been pursuing a new career. Twice I’ve interviewed and been one of two applicants to be finally considered, and twice I haven’t gotten the job….which means, as of right now, I’m still in my old position, one that I’m not particularly fired up about. Thank you for helping me see this as my “bridge”, one that I have to keep strong in order to cross it and move on!

  • Lucinda July 31, 2012, 9:20 am

    Stop believing I’m small and “that it really doesn’t matter”. I’ve turned my work life around ( it’s still a bridge job; I actually took a step down from management to survive) by stepping out of where they needed me to be and getting to stand on my own. I appreciate where and who I am now.

  • Lisabeth July 31, 2012, 8:52 am

    oh this is just AWESOME this morning. now I’m going to take up my work day in a whole new way — and it’s funny, I’m technically doing a dream job, but I’ve been treating it like a bridge job lately. thank you!

  • Christi Daniels July 31, 2012, 8:48 am

    Thank you Mama Gena! I’ve been slugging away with my bridge job and in a slump (in between two points of greatness!) for awhile now. THIS was the message I needed to hear today.

    Even though I’ve been devouring your work and I just returned from Unleash the Power Within, drinking from a water bottle that says ‘Live with Passion’, turning this passion toward the very thing I don’t want to do each day somehow escaped me.

    I’m very curious about this now and interested to see what my passion actually looks like in relation to this bridge job.

    Much love and gratitude!

  • Melinda Cohan July 31, 2012, 8:22 am

    “My passion moved me…”

    brilliant (as always)!!! And what i love about what you’ve written here is that you are not talking about “fake it ’till you make it” because what i know about you is you fully dove in to outrageously loving exactly where you were. not because you wanted to move forward to something else. but because you utterly and deeply loved EXACTLY where you were.

    and then…”my passion moved me…”

  • Elly July 31, 2012, 8:11 am

    This is so true. I had a bridge job (working for a major TV company) long hours, bitchy atmosphere – believe me TV is not the friendliest place to work! I was unappreciated etc etc. I turned it all around by being grateful for my job, I did my job brilliantly so much so that they started calling me The Oracle, I befriended the bitchiest colleagues and when I left everyone said it was like all the light had gone in the area I worked. I then started working for myself and have never looked back.
    Mama is right, when you appreciate where you are and shine where you are the next step follows so easily.

  • Irisa MacKenzie July 31, 2012, 8:04 am

    This couldn’t have been more timely for me. I spent the weekend building my website, or portal to my dream while the last few days I’ve been irritable and miserable having to come to my bridge job. Not living my passion is eating me alive already.


  • Cathy July 31, 2012, 7:55 am

    I am trying to live my passion of helping others through my blog, being a Peer Resource and writing for a health website. I love what I do. But my husband is in a job he HAD to take after being laid off. They treat him horribly, as they do all the employees. He is 54 years old and I am afraid for his health. He is in good shape but you never know. We want to move but cannot because of many reasons, one of them being the job market and we need health insurance. We are living a miserable life because of what is happening to him. No jobs out there for how he wants to live his passion. We need the money because our son is in college (tuition!). We have no social life because he is always working. We are most unhappy right now. I wish I could say your post helped me, I really do. Unfortunately that is not the case…

    • Lorraine July 31, 2012, 10:23 am

      I can only imagine what is happening to you.
      It is hard ….. My passion is reminding people to treasure today. We focus so much on the future and manifesting we overlook the beauty in front of us. Life has been hard for us the last few years but I find I am treasuring the richness of today. There is grief and days I wonder how I will goo but more and more I am counting the miracles and recognizing today is the day the Lord has so rejoice and be glad in it. Which means. Dan e laugh sing. And remember to love my life. Right now and right here.

      Mama is right. Waiting for a miracle. No. Life is miracle. Love changes everything

      Thanks mama

    • mama gena July 31, 2012, 1:31 pm

      i feel you, sister!!

    • Shabs August 21, 2012, 4:37 pm

      It’s a slow process from feeling as hopeless as you do to feeling passionate, that’s one thing that I found. Maybe a good in-between is feeling thankful. Thankful that you wake up to your husband, your love, every morning. Many people don’t have that. Thankful for your boy and any other children you have. Thankful for the small things. Once you lift yourself a little, it’s easier to look for other positives in your life!

  • FN July 31, 2012, 7:16 am

    Oh wow, this is so me right now. I only two months away from finishing my university degree but the last two years in which I had to do my exams and master thesis have actually felt like a bridge job. Definitly no joy in it.
    You know, I’ve read your books and blog and watched your videos but up to now, I obviously didn’t get the whole concept of starting right from where you are. It didn’t even occur to me that it meant not only accepting things as they are and for what they are, but actually LOVING the current situation like it was my dream life. Thanks so much for this!
    And now I am going to write some job application letters with all the love, joy and passion I’ve got.

  • Becky July 31, 2012, 7:12 am

    Thank you!! I needed this.

  • Jo July 31, 2012, 6:31 am

    Mama Gena, this is your best yet! Thanks so much for your wonderful post. So inspiring. So awesomely simple and so true! Yeah, no need to change a thing. Thank you for this great reminder to just be my authentic self , show up and share this with others. Now re-charged, I’m going for a 10/10 daily passion connection starting right now 🙂

  • Marty July 31, 2012, 6:13 am

    SINCE retiring (going on 5 years….I’m 63) I HAVE had the TIME to practice passion. Then again, while I was working as a teacher and a dean I practiced passion too. I feel very grateful, blessed and I make it a daily habit to pray, meditate, thank God, scoot over for God. Even then, passion is a struggle at times because I have an adult child who has moved back in my home ………. and I find myself mentally pre-occupied with his needs …….. and that wears me out …….. soooo, I pray, meditate, thank God, scoot over for God ……. and I dance. I dance I dance I dance. I dance with passion.

  • Laurie July 31, 2012, 5:56 am

    Wow! This resonates so much with me right now. I am a law professor who was just serving out the last few years before retirement so I could live my passion. It was a job I once loved, and still enjoyed many parts of it, but I was ready to move on. Then I got “promoted” to associate dean, and I find myself feeling irritable and cranky every day because it was not the move I wanted to make. I am going to follow your advice and embrace the challenge with all of my passion…and see where that leads. Thank you for the advice.

    • mama gena July 31, 2012, 1:29 pm

      keep in touch, let me know how it goes and how i can be of service, laurie!