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The erotic freedom of giving your all


It’s very nearly July 4th.
Which has me thinking about freedom, intense effort, and something I have noticed.
There is nothing more erotic than giving your all.
Whether it’s to create freedom for yourself, or others.
To stand firmly for what’s right.
Pulling out all the stops, no holding back, and offering all of your attention and all of your love to your endeavors.
To live your commitments, no holds barred.
Giving your all is how to create your destiny, and realign the world.

When I lead my classes, I leave it all on the stage, every time.
Riding hard and coming back sweaty is where the fun is.
The only reason I am capable of laying it all down, day after day, week after week, month after month, in every dimension of my life, is that I know pleasure and I connect daily to my erotic nature.

Pleasure does not deliver you from a life of great output, but, rather, it insists you live your passions with every drop of your being. (Click to tweet!)
Which, inside our culture, is a revolutionary act.

It is not easy to live your passion in a world that encourages mediocrity. And living your passion — choosing to surrender to that place of inner knowing — places each of us in the vulnerable uncertainty of not knowing the outcome, or how we will get there.
Giving our all does not protect us from the times in our lives where we feel the darkness before the dawn, when we very nearly implode from the intense pressure, of work deadlines, of massive projects, of rupture in our personal lives. During those dark days, it feels like it might never get better, and we begin to doubt that we will ever get to where we want to go.

But soon after that lowest point, and, in fact, precisely because of the lowest point, things transform, the sun rises, resolution comes, the unimaginable occurs.

The trick to accelerate and realign your world is to keep flow and movement happening. In other words, you must bring your erotic power to the pressure.
You might feel the urge to collapse, to lay still, to get brittle.
Sink into your erotic nature, instead.

Feel the pleasure in being with the intensity, feel it, flow with it, and continue to pour your passion into your life like you were Janis Joplin singing “Piece of My Heart.” Once you become determined never to give up your connection to your deepest pleasure, your deepest passion — that is where the miraculous lands in your lap.

Here is the equation: pressure + turn-on = diamonds from coal

beach_toastIn addition to that, the next key is to take the time and space you need to celebrate and recover. How do you celebrate?
Throw a party, make a toast, write a love letter to yourself, dance, hug a tree, gather with friends and acknowledge all that happened and all you went through, and what you learned, gained, and how you benefited, as well as the difficulties you encountered.

Second, take time to rest and restore. Recharge your batteries…have an orgasm or two or three. Have sex. Self-pleasure. Dance. Go to the beach. The country. The mountains. Get a massage. Sleep. Spend time in sisterhood.

Be gentle with that sweet body of yours.
Treat her like the Queen of the World.
Love her like she was your baby.

Through this process is freedom — freedom to know you can make it through anything, no matter how intense. Freedom to live your turned-on erotic power no matter what. And freedom to then celebrate your phenomenal efforts and the outcome — whatever that may be.

And it’s in that celebration that I have an exciting announcement for you. Every year, teaching Mastery and Creation, it’s 6 months of teaching two full weekends a month, taking a trip to Paris, hosting an huge introductory weekend — it’s a crazy amount of output, when the pressure is on.

summer_2So every summer, I take time to celebrate and recover — heading out of the city to a beach house near my horse. This summer, I’m going to ride, relax, and work on my new book.

As part of that, I’ve lined up a special eight-week summer series for you. I’ve recruited 8 magnificent guest writers to take you each week on an unplugged tour of the Womanly Arts we practice at the School. If you’ve ever wondered what the Womanly Arts actually are, how exactly they operate in a woman’s life, and how and why they work…stay tuned!

With freedom and excitement,
P.S. Celebration following intense passionate effort is your patriotic duty. I came across this fantastic quote from one of our founding fathers, John Adams, to his wife, Abigail:

“The second day of July, 1776, will be the most memorable epoch in the history of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival. It ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with shows, games, sports, guns, bells, bonfires, and illuminations, from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward forever more.”

(July 2nd was the day the Declaration of Independence was approved by Congress. July 4th was the date the document was signed.)

So, party down this week, in honor of all the passion that was poured into the creation of our incredible country, and all the passion you have poured into the work of art that is your magnificent life.

P.P.S. In the comments below, please let me know how you are celebrating your own intense efforts this summer. I want to hear where you are passionately engaged (the coal), and how you are honoring the diamonds you have created!

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38 Comments / Leave a Comment

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  • SG Ssanyu July 8, 2014, 7:08 pm

    On July 4th 2002, I gave birth to my oldest son. What a great birthday gift to him of a truly joyous and turned-on Mama. Thank you!

  • ST Lorraine July 8, 2014, 4:41 pm

    Dearest Sisters,
    Your writings have touched my heart and have inspired me to respond by just giving thanks to all of you for being a part of my life.

  • Stacey July 3, 2014, 3:13 pm

    Every year we proudly watch at least one of my two beautiful daughter in our town’s 4th of July parade. From there we travel a short distance to the nearby river and wait for the fireworks. This -waiting for fireworks- can be exhausting and frustrating because in order to get a good spot you have to get there early. Food is overpriced, the weather is always super hot and there is little shade, and once the band starts playing and the speeches start it gets seriously boring. This makes for hot, hungry, thirsty, cranky people (and several dogs). This year, however, I’ve decided to change things up a bit. I remember Mama mentioning the pleasure to be found in anticipation so I started making my list on Monday of what would make me happy on the 4th. I decided that packing a picnic basket full of our favorite (non-meltable) snacks, a cooler full of our favorite drinks, and a lovely gold table cloth (that I never use at Christmas because its too big for the table) would make eating and sitting more pleasurable. I’ve been carrying that vision in my head all week and the list in my desk at work for use during stressful times. I plan to pack a couple small games to help keep the boredom away. I’ve also put some thought into what I’ll be wearing -a skirt because I never do and am always envious of the ladies I see wearing them. I’m hoping the fireworks will be a colorful end to an amazing evening, rather than a relief that we can finally go home . Thank you, Mama, for your help in this. Happy 4th everyone!!

  • BSG Glitzy Cougar Karen July 2, 2014, 9:08 am

    This was so inspiring, Regena, as I too keep moving forward…this summer…to my webinar for Hay House! Taking this work out to women via my coaching, my shows, takes a lot of inspiration…thanks for modeling it for all of us.

  • Emily July 1, 2014, 10:24 pm

    What perfect timing, Mama G!!!! Today I launched my crowdfunding campaign for my new business, Shift Bars, the world’s first raw began sugar-free energy bar. I have been working on this for months and for the first time, am really putting all my energy into something. I am tired but so proud of myself. I hope you and the other SG’s will check it out and spread the word, it would mean so much to me!!!

    SG Emily

  • Laura Jacobs July 1, 2014, 9:52 pm

    You more than deserve all the passion pleasure and joy life has to offer.
    I am spending the summer integrating 2 masteries and creation 1 so I am MORE than ready for the MORE of Creation #2.
    I am getting acupuncture ,eating well ,dancing ,working out,t going to the shore ( I am from Philly ) that is what we call the beach hanging out with SG keeping up with my pod calls
    and of course using every tool in the book

    See you in September ready to rock and roll

  • SG Catherine, Goddess of Sex and Drums July 1, 2014, 9:34 pm

    I have no idea how I’m going to celebrate my intense efforts. I guess I had never thought of celebrating them because they still haven’t brought the results that I want. I had better think about that. I just wanted to thank you for this blog post. I am waiting for my diamonds. I am waiting for the sun to come up. It’s been so dark for so long now and I don’t know how much longer I can hang on.

    • Ruby Red July 2, 2014, 7:29 am

      You can do it. I have faith in you. You are so much stronger than you know! And your sisters are here to cheer you on; just ask us! xo

    • Esther Fink July 5, 2014, 10:10 pm

      You certainly inspired everyone with your performance on talent show night!!!! You were WOW and got the biggest ovation! There are many people in the world that are hungry for the joy you can bring them out of their troubles. : )

  • Deb Durham July 1, 2014, 6:24 pm

    I was just recounting today how much better care I take of my self these days post SWA and put myself #1. Thank you, Mama Gena, for your brilliant schooling. I, too, am enjoying a delicious summer living back in temperate California reveling in sunshine, cool ocean breezes, local cultural excursions, yoga, beachside dining and drinking, laughing a lot with good friends, a week on Cape Cod followed by a tour in a 1955 pink Cadillac tracing the roots of the blues in Memphis. Along with these delicious activities, I’m winding down my business and preparing for a 6 month-1 year break in 2015 before I start the next business adventure. I feel relaxed already just thinking about it all. Like SG Patty, I think we should just operate on the school year schedule all the time. xoxo

  • Barbara Kislak July 1, 2014, 2:22 pm

    I applaud you for working so hard to recover 5 minutes at a time. My heart goes out to you because I understand loss.
    One thing I have learned is to expand my definition of “family”. Let us in. When you have the strength let some of us become part of your “family”.
    SG Barbara

  • Allison July 1, 2014, 1:08 pm

    I am celebrating life by taking some time to go to Maine, to the beach, and to kayak in the sea. And eat blueberry pie and rhubarb pie all summer long. I am confident that I will find the most pleasureful partner(s) to experience these things with me this summer, whether in NY or Maine or somewhere else, even better.

    Enjoy your time this summer, Mama Gena!

  • Jean July 1, 2014, 12:38 pm

    thank you, thank you, Mama Gena, I am in recovery mode from caring for my husband and best friend thru cancer, for 6 months, until he made his transition the first week of May. Just learning how to care for myself, by myself. Facing the reality and trusting in the universe to carry me forward, vulnerability has never been my strong suit, and I am slowly learning. Thank you for your wise words.

  • SG Grace July 1, 2014, 12:15 pm

    One year ago today, I was in the ER, being diagnosed with the heart condition, Atrial Fibrillation. Scary!

    What’s unfolded has been an ordeal and an adventure. Connecting with amazing doctors and healers who have helped me on my path to healing. Six months after my hospital procedure in December of last year, my cardiologist tells me we can consider the procedure a success. I consider this a triumph, as many need more than one of these procedures.

    And it’s a triumph because alongside the awful symptoms, I found myself dealing with a dastardly insurance company who decided that my heart condition was a pre-existing condition and refused to pay for any of the $120,000+ in medical bills. One night in the hospital alone was over $100,000. Welcome to healthcare in America, pre-Obamacare!

    I discovered SG power I didn’t know I had and have negotiated and persisted doggedly in dealing with the 12 providers and the mountain of paperwork. About 95% of the claims have been either written off or the bills deeply discounted. I have respectfully and consistently insisted on this, refusing to be bankrupted by the system that helped to heal my heart. The other huge claim is being appealed and my fabulous, powerful Healthcare Advocate and I are awaiting the response to the appeal.

    I have been reborn and feel more confident than ever. I feel profound gratitude for the simple things in life I can enjoy, like going for a walk. A year ago I couldn’t do that.

    Rest and celebration are so important! Now, my heart is always first in my life.

  • SG Patty July 1, 2014, 10:53 am

    Mama Gena, enjoy your rest and relaxation! You so deserve it. Looking forward to that next book and what is percolating in that juicy brain of yours.
    This summer I’m taking a break and reveling in all the beauty the islands have to offer. It’s almost like my internal clock is re set to school time. Work-September through May. Play – June, July, August.

  • Ruby Red July 1, 2014, 10:43 am

    I’m in less than 2 weeks I’m massively celebrating my lifelong efforts of trial and error, tears and hope, researching, getting therapized, discovering and adventuring and exploring, all to find the love of my life….. whom I have found at last, at age 54! We’re throwing a no-holds-barred wedding celebration of love and joy, with dancing to a big band, and a dj, and with a heartfelt and passionate ceremony, white satin and glitz, cake and goodies, the ocean, and 100 of our loved ones and friends.
    I thank my Sister Goddessess here for helping me conjure her, my true love, by my talking with SGs on the for about 2 years. Celebrate big with us! xo

    • Allison July 1, 2014, 12:56 pm

      Very excited to hear this! Congratulations! I am in the midst of a likely breakup/ difficult relationship, and am battling the thought that I’ll never find the right one. Glad to hear of love found!

      SG Ah! Allison

      • Ruby Red July 2, 2014, 7:26 am

        I felt just like you did. So many breakups! The peace and freedom you will feel when it’s right will confirm that you are doing the right thing now, opening up to the one for you. I trust that it will happen for you, and I can’t wait to hear of your ecstatic adventures when it happens! xo

  • Lauren July 1, 2014, 10:32 am

    Fabulous blog this week!

    Thanks MG!


  • lauren July 1, 2014, 10:31 am

    Sending Patricia strength and love,
    5 minutes IS the resurrection and the life.


  • Melissa July 1, 2014, 10:28 am

    This weekend as I celebrate our nation’s freedom, I am celebrating my freedom. July 11 will be 1 year since I walked out of a dangerous, explosive marriage. So, as I watch the fireworks explode in the sky and laugh and have a fabulous time with my family and friends. I’m going to pretend each firework that ignites and flames is a picture of what all I’ve let go off and looking forward to a great future however it may turn out!!! I am ready to soar!!!

  • Georgina July 1, 2014, 10:04 am

    Patricia, I am sending you so much love from U.K. My heart goes out to you sweetheart. xxx

  • Jane Gossard July 1, 2014, 9:55 am

    Thanks so much for this post. I am celebrating this week with some of my favorite women – my fabulous daughter who is living her passion as an activist and struggling not to get burned out – my granddaughter (who is almost two and so where we all can be if we live our joy and pleasure), my best friend who is so good at being in her pleasure all the time. I’m celebrating with gratitude for heat (all kinds) and beauty and love and whatever makes me happy!

  • patricia July 1, 2014, 9:49 am

    I am trying too hang on by facing life 5 minutes at a time, just 5. if I make it through those 5 then I try for 5 more and so on. My beloved daughter took her own life New Years day and since then I have also lost my son, my only 2 children and my 2 of whom i raised and he called me mom for 8 years of his short 10 years. The 2 years he lived with my daughter he continued to stay with me 50% of the time. In the short span of a few weeks I lost all family and everything I loved in this world. March I thought I would die but somehow using the 5 minute survival plan I have managed to make it to today. I am not sure if that will be possible tomorrow, next week or next year.I see no point, no love, no family, nothing but unbearable, crushing pain and now guilt. I was mom, I took care of everyone and fixed everything. I failed my children and grandchildren and am now just a broken down crushed old woman, who’s lif and heart is shattered beyond repair.yet still I breathe, I honestly do not know how or why my body is still living……………………….

    • Kathleen Graas July 1, 2014, 9:55 am

      Please contact me.

    • melodyk July 1, 2014, 9:59 am

      We live love. Alive, awake, aware – we keep dear their memory. Every day.

    • Melissa July 1, 2014, 10:25 am

      Don’t give up! How tremendous you reach out! Keep living. Keep moving. Keep going! Those 5 you are surviving will become more!!

    • Gloria Gaytan July 1, 2014, 10:27 am


      I will remember you in my prayers. I hope you are in therapy, and have a supportive network of friends. You certainly have one here, with Mama Gena.


    • Ruby Red July 1, 2014, 10:34 am

      I’m sending love and healing to you, 5 minutes at a time!

    • Simin Vaswani July 1, 2014, 2:00 pm

      Sending you lots of love while you go through this rupture, you are a powerful soul and I am holding a space of strength for you.

    • Jill Fromelius July 1, 2014, 3:13 pm

      Holding you in so much love, comfort and wholeness. We can not pick the path another lives, you can only choose your own. You are still alive. If you can not live for you, live for them, until you can live for you. Honor and celebrate their lives by living yours as fully as you can. Be the amazing woman you were born to be. Let the love of All that Is- God, the Universe, every living thing, fill, heal and enliven you. I have not suffered the losses you have, but I know loss that took most of my life away. Only until I chose to focus on and live something else. Our stories do not define us, they make us who we are- you have a choice about that. Allow yourself to heal. Allow yourself to mourn, grieve, cry, rant, what ever- in the spaces in between- LIVE. Love yourself. Love is all there is. Love is eternal- never ends, never dies. You have more angels in heaven watching over you now- they are always with you. Inspite of what it looks like, you are not alone. I will hold you in my heart and in my prayers.

    • SG Luscious Robin July 1, 2014, 4:39 pm


      There are really no words to say to you other than I am so sorry. And that the only thing we know is that this will eventually change and eventually it will not be quite this bad. When, I don’t know.

      I don’t know if you live in NYC, but wherever you live there are groups that truly help. I went to Friends In Deed when I lost my mother, my marriage, my job and my daughter moved away. I felt like I lost both my families (my sister and I didn’t speak) and I never felt so much pain. But knowing I wasn’t alone, talking about it, writing about it, crying about it, taking care of myself — reading books like When Things Fall Apart, The Dark Night of the Soul, Eckhart Tolle The New Earth — all of that eventually helped.

      With great empathy and respect for all that you are going through.

    • Estela July 2, 2014, 12:04 pm

      Now that only you knows how it feels down there, when you
      are so totally and completely crushed,wait & see, you might
      access to the Presence of God through your pain. You are not
      alone, your guides & angels are with you and your loved ones
      are also present. You might even feel their presence. You will
      join them one day, when you complete your circle.
      I hold your hand, with love

    • SG Leslie July 2, 2014, 2:51 pm

      You are those things, and you are also so much more. You are a creator of life and a storehouse of memories. You are a goddess, a daughter, and a mother. You are still a mother.
      You don’t need to repair your life. You just need to keep living in those 5 minute increments until they gradually stretch to more, until you can fill all of your broken parts with gold.

    • Stacey July 3, 2014, 5:06 pm

      I’m so sorry for your losses. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.

    • Steph July 5, 2014, 9:14 pm

      Patricia, we are here with you, praying for you and sending you love and light. Every 5 minutes, remember. You are not alone.

  • Esther Fink July 1, 2014, 9:37 am

    I am celebrating the freedom I have learned at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts by flirting with THE WORLD! With people, men and women, with nature, with myself.
    Thank you for this lesson. It feels so ALIVE & FREE!

  • Annettielove July 1, 2014, 9:36 am

    To celebrate my goddess nature and recharge, I am taking a cruise by myself on the fabulous Norweigian Breakaway. Spending mornings meditating nude on my balcony, days in the spa, evenings enjoying people and dancing and nights of unexpected pleasure!!!