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Can you flirt your way out of a paper bag?


It’s a funny thing about women.
Funny, wonderful, and frankly, perpetually irritating.
As successful as we are, as strong as we stand, as helpful and nurturing as we can be, we just don’t feel right unless we are really living in to the essential hot, molten core fire of being a woman.
If we ain’t flirting*, we ain’t living.
We limp along, glumly, victimized by every hap and mishap.
Pissed, hurt, disappointed, thinking “Is that all there is—really?’
Even if we go the distance and power through a sink full of dishes, run a fierce board meeting, or sit on the phone with a needy friend for an hour, we don’t feel proud and radiant like an Olympian who’s won the race.  Rather, we feel fried, toasted, and wasted, ready to reach for the glass of wine and the jumbo sized Kit Kat bar.  Not flush with renewed life and a sense of deep accomplishment.

When we don’t stand in our radiance, we feel like a cell phone that has run out of batteries—the casing is there, but nothing inside is working.
We can push every key, and throw the little device smack up against a wall—but if there is no juice, there is no juice, and that is the end of the story.
A woman is no different.
Unless she is a woman who knows her way around the Womanly Arts. These are a secret set of lost arts, finessed by the greatest women in history…

It is inspiring.
There are women in the world who know how to get the man they long for.
The job they deserve that pays more than they imagined.
How to create real intimacy with their girlfriends.
How to be a sexy mom.
And how to shed the Kit Kat weight and fuel themselves with some real down-home nutrients that matter to a woman. (I’ll introduce you to a handful of these women in my next video).

If you want to master each and every one of the Womanly Arts and become a sharpshooter at targeting whatever it is that you long for, check out Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp.

In the comments below, tell me one specific way you plan to practice the Art of Flirtation today. And, if you want to add a swing in another woman’s step, please share this post on Facebook, Twitter, email, etc.

With so much love and pleasure,
Mama Gena

*The Womanly Art of Flirtation is the natural resting state for woman.  Flirtation is a way that a woman makes her way in the world, with her passion fully engaged, her lights on, and her juices flowing.  Flirtation is all about enjoying yourself, for no apparent reason, other than it is fun to be a woman and fun to have the power and the ability to turn on.  Flirtation is nothing more and nothing less than enjoying yourself in the presence of another person or persons.  Women were born to flirt.  Flirtation is in our DNA.

P.S. Catch up on the first two videos in this series here:
Video One: Start getting what you want now
Video Two: What your mama never told you

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30 Comments / Leave a Comment

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  • Wind Firedancing August 9, 2012, 10:04 pm

    Mama Gena, I love this!! I thought I had lost the art of flirtation because I freeze up around the guy I’m so attracted to. This reminded me that I do know how to flirt – I haven’t lost this! I flirt all the time, almost everywhere I go and it makes me feel fabulous! Now I have to carry that over to this new relationship……..and now I know how to do it! <3

  • marcitabonita August 9, 2012, 6:01 am

    So ridiculously generous! This video is AMAZING. I was in Mastery 2006, am happy to report that I still use my tools, and the womanly arts have been and continue to be so instrumental in my life and the success I have achieved.
    Thank you for continuously nourishing us women in all the ways that you do. I watch you from afar and never cease to be amazed by all that you give and the greatness you teach, to all those you touch. Enhancing the lives of countless women, no words can express my gratitude for you and your selfless giving of who you are and the important message of your life work, that is shifting the lives of so many. –So much love from my heart to yours, and of course the entire SG community at large!
    SG Marcita (Fall Mastery 2006)

    • mama gena August 9, 2012, 8:53 am

      are you flirting with me? 🙂
      seriously- thank you.

  • Shanel August 9, 2012, 1:23 am

    Flirting is the sexiest thing a woman can do! By loving herself and loving her life , a woman becomes the most enjoyable force to be around. This has been the most precious lesson I have learned in life; to be happy no matter what and to always choose plesaure!!!!

  • sloopystillonnaharlee August 8, 2012, 10:11 pm

    I do not flirt to make anyone feel good, I flirt because I feel FABULOUS and hot and wild and juicy and incredible and whether anyone responds is irrelevant…I’m just being me…a response in kind is cool but not needed…and it really is true that you must approve totally like totally of yourself, all your selves, to do it- …self adoration releases your BOLDNESS and JUICE and FIRE and alla that good stuff………thanks MaMa!

  • Michaela August 8, 2012, 11:52 am

    I love you! Thank you! Headed to a picnic w/ a girlfriend, who I will now be flirting w/ in a Pussified setting. xoxoox

  • SG Mosaic Muse August 8, 2012, 11:00 am

    Ahhh…flirtation…it is an art! Enjoying myself, enjoying others, acknowledging the Divine in all of us -YES!

  • julia August 8, 2012, 5:22 am

    wow it’s brilliant, touches the whole womanly being, i’m proud to be a woman.
    thank you

  • SG HotChilli August 8, 2012, 4:22 am

    Oh Mama, you are so very right, yesterday I sat with a needy friend on the phone for an hour.
    It feels never being enough no matter what and how much I did. I am so grateful for your post and your activities reminding me on my inner power and to dial up my light. It will take some practice and much dicipline to bring me there I where I want to be. But I am up for it no matter how long the trip to me will be! I wonder how the bootcamp will work for the godesses in europe with the time shift and all. That is why I am hesitating to join.

  • Linda August 7, 2012, 5:32 pm

    I guess I am one of those natural flirts. Like T.L. Cooper said, flirting is just being friendly. It is good old fashioned courtesy. It is things like carefully paying attention to what people are saying when they talk to you, cheerfully complimenting someone of either sex when you notice they have put forth some effort, good eye contact, smiling, and not letting someone intimidate you. Right now I am not working for health reasons, but my favorite job in the past was all about flirting. I worked at a small public accounting firm. Most of the women who worked there seemed intimidated by the partners. I flirted, sat with them at lunch, teased the senior partner mercilessly, and they loved it. They all knew that I was very happily married, and we would talk about family and life. When my mom became terminally ill and I tried to quit, they convinced me to stay part time. When my husbands travel got too much and I quit again they hired me as a contractor to help on projects when I was available. They called me “sunshine”. It is all about radiating a positive presence in a world where negativity, abruptness, and rudeness seem to be the norm. Flirting is not a “goal oriented” activity. It is just all about enjoying your life and the people in it! It does not have to be about sexuality (although in the right environment it certainly could be) but just about being in the moment. I try to do it each and every day. Even on down days it is a way to lift my mood as well as others. I even flirt with my doctors and surgeons. Do not be intimidated by other people no matter what or who they are. Just enjoy whoever you are around. It is contagious!

    SG Linda

    • regena August 7, 2012, 5:44 pm

      Linda- You have really reaped the benefits of being a fantastic flirt!

  • T. L. Cooper August 7, 2012, 1:24 pm

    It’s kind of strange to me when you describe “flirting” because it’s what I call being friendly. It’s simply the art (or act) of showing people appreciation for the little things while enjoying each moment you inhabit…

  • Nancy August 7, 2012, 12:42 pm

    You should TOTALLY go back and do Conan’s show on TBS! Loved the video, you inspire me daily! XOXOX

  • Dominique August 7, 2012, 12:33 pm

    I tapped into this a few years ago to amazing results — and not about “getting men” but about having a love fest with the world so to speak. I used to be stuck in the space that said I want to be taken seriously and I’m highly analytical so my mistaken notion was that flirting would diminish me or my intellect so I had this stuffed down for YEARS. Then I realized that being womanly — not “slutty”, womanly — was a life force and essence that came from LOVE. One of the cool things I did was recalibrate my speech. I realized my clipped speech and fast speech was wrapped around demonstrating how quickly my mind could think….yet it didn’t do much for the ambience of the room or to set a loving mood. I worked with a voice coach ONE TIME and she was able to show me how speaking differently made me FEEL different. I began speaking to everyone in a more soft and gentle way — more womanly — and I FELT DIFFERENT. And thus my journey in my womanlyness began and words cannot describe the journey or the new destination I’m not at. Totally new, different person and woman. I wish I knew this at 24 is all I can say. The whole story would be so so so so different but I still have 40 years with this new woman and I love her very much!!

    • regena August 7, 2012, 5:43 pm

      awww… good!

  • SG Luscious Lisa August 7, 2012, 12:24 pm

    Hi Mama Gena,

    I really enjoyed your video on flirting as a spiritual practice, and I LOVED the dual example of a woman going into a Starbucks either glum or lit up, and the impact on everyone around her. Thank you for reminding up how truly IMPORTANT this art is!

    By the way, I appreciate YOU being such an inspirational role model for this art as well! You looked so happy in this video and your dress with the red accents and matching red lipstick is fantastic! You are embodying your self approval and turn on!

  • Becky August 7, 2012, 11:17 am

    I Love You Mama Gena!
    Thanks for the reminder!

  • SG Kimberly D August 7, 2012, 11:01 am

    Mama Gena, I am the most fabulous flirt! I originally learned this art from watching my fun-loving flirtatious mother, but since I began Mastery, I am actually tapping in to and feeling that raw power – the power of my joy 🙂 I feel so much more free to flirt and to have my way with the world. I flirt EVERYWHERE! With my roomates, friends, the boys at the bike shop. I find I am able to transform crankiness around me into fun and light-heartedness. Thank you for this.

    • regena August 7, 2012, 5:42 pm

      Thanks for going for it!!

  • Andie August 7, 2012, 9:53 am

    Not only CAN’T I flirt my way out of a paper bag, but I can’t even flirt my way into anyone desireable’s pants! I seem to only attract the attention extremely aggressive street harassers (i.e., crackheads and dirty old men). Which makes me angry, and therefore less likely to flirt when a guy I’m interested in rolls by — which hasn’t happened for months! I feel like I’m caught in a vicious cycle, where I don’t have a safe space to flirt in my daily life — the city streets and my buttoned-up office are not good for flirting, and I’m perpetually peeved by the lewd comments and kissy noises hurled at me on the street every day, so I’m not up for flirting on the rare occasions when it would be desireable/appropriate. What should I do?

    (BTW, I’m doing very well with the other womanly arts , so this is muy frustrating!)

    • regena August 7, 2012, 5:42 pm

      Oh yeah: Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp. Now drop and give me 20…. 🙂

  • BSG Glitzy Cougar Karen August 7, 2012, 9:27 am

    What a juicy reminder! I always know I have to ramp this one up, and last night I did it, to GREAT effect! But I will let you know about that personally:)

  • Djanira August 7, 2012, 8:36 am

    Thank you for the reminder Mama Gena

    I’d love some resources or tips on exactly HOW to flirt.

    The first image that came to mind was batting my eyelashes at everyone, but that doesn’t seem appropriate. I’ assuming you mean something more along the lines of giving people your full attention and finding something nice to say about them.

    Another other ideas from all the sister goddesses for safe flirting?

    • Linmayu August 7, 2012, 10:56 am

      First, flirt with your goddess self! Enjoy being in your own gorgeous skin, thoroughly approve of who you are, and notice what is pleasurable to you…then all you have to do is act the same way around other people. <3

    • regena August 7, 2012, 5:40 pm

      Hey Djanira-
      Thanks so much for your reply! My first book, Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts has a whole chapter on flirtation, which you will love. and if you want some real live training with me, enroll on my website for Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp and I will give you deep in-depth training in all The Womanly Arts!

      • femg August 18, 2012, 12:56 pm

        As an older overweight woman I have had the looks of disdain and smirks thrown my way by many who still think only skinny model types dare to be bodacious about their beauty. It was very embarrassing and made me feel ashamed. Sometimes thats just too much to deal with and this flirting practice can really be a set back. I can’t be the only one who has had this experience in reality, so I’d love some comments about gender and age bias when it comes to putting yourself out their with exuberance just because you can and having it met with “shame on you’ .

        • Gypsy Lee September 1, 2012, 9:47 am

          hey femg
          keep your centre
          love your self
          if others don’t show you the good feeling don’t focus on them – they bring you down
          i am an over 50 carrying a bit of flab and pounds and belly dance… in front of many people – i don’t “flaunt my fat” – i dance the dance with joy and happiness and grace… and if someone in the audience doesn’t approve, so what!

  • Pamela Gray-Steeves August 7, 2012, 7:19 am

    ~Good Morning Mama G…. Awesome video and truth. I practice this womanly art each and every day, but in honor of you will dial it up today! The house is quiet as I sip my first cup of coffee and read mail, but I decided to coax out my beautiful sister Sal…our luscious feline. Took out one of her favorite red boa toys and teased and pleased my fellow huntress into a frenzy. 🙂 Most days I take my cue from this soulful sister and it was indeed a pleasure to start her day and mine, in the most Purrrrrrfect way. Have a fabulous day Ma and thank-you again. XO Pam~

  • Lola August 7, 2012, 7:12 am

    Flirting is a skill I am re-igniting. I am allowing my passion to encompass all that I do. For so long I kept my passion under wraps because I didn’t want to outshine others. Well, those others who say I outshine them have been envious of my passion and power. Little did I know they yearn for these qualities-little did I know how oppressing and depressing I was was because I was withholding my passion to make them feel better about themselves. Well, I have learned that “happiness is an inside job.” Now, I radiate, I celebrate, I am living. I love being a woman.