Single Greetings from Single Regena | Mama Gena Moments

Darlings!

Single greetings from single Regena!

So, I was on the Today show on Tuesday. And it was the second time in the last two months that I had been on the show as a single person, answering dating questions and giving dating advice. And I realized that, even though I have been separated from my first husband since January, I have not really written to you all about my new adventure as the single, dating queen of pleasure.

Why?

Well, because it is terrifying, really. There is so much to do. First, there is finding the right nanny. Which, as far as I can tell, has less room for error and is even more challenging than finding the right guy to date. There is way more margin for error in dating than in child care. My record was employing four nannies in one day. Thank Goddess I only did that twice....uh, three times. (More on that later.)

And then there is the real rigor, which all of us face, which is tending to our pleasure, despite the maelstrom of life. How do you, after you have taught a class, fired the nanny, done an interview while cooking dinner, had the office manager quit, put the kid to bed, taken out the garbage, walked the dog, find time to pleasure yourself??

Hello!! How have you all been doing this for years!!??? Someone please tell me??? I am in awe at your resilience and willingness! Doing the work of being a single parent is a comparative breeze. It is all about necessity. But it is sooo easy to forget about, or ignore or not have time for pleasure. And then of course you know the consequences, as I do: you become a dried-up, bitter, old crust of resentment and despair.
Lovely. Right?

So, exhausted, we reach for our candles, our rose petals, our lube... Oh, the effort, oh the courage involved when you just sooo want to be cranky and sooo deserve to be cranky. But, I gotta tell you, reaching for it pays off.

I have been dating only since May, and I have already had the beginning, middle and end of one of the great ecstatic, ridiculously fun love affairs of my life. I am so grateful for that experience and many others. I have walked into my kitchen in the morning, and found my bra wrapped around the coffee maker, been invited to smoke sheeshah and drink mint tea by a hot young waiter who picked me up last week, packed up the dog, the kid and the nanny to enjoy the beach-front estate of a fantastically princely guy in the Hamptons, been taken to amazing dinners, been kissed in an extraordinary variety of ways.

I have also had guys decline my offers, not ask for my number when I thought it was a “shoe-in” and never call back, when I thought we had something fun going on. As my Dad would say, "This is living, kid!"

And I am astonished and filled with awe and gratitude.

I am grateful to Bruce, my first husband, for our 13-year partnership, for having the courage to start a new adventure for himself, for being so generous with me and for protecting me from many harsh realities for so many years.

I am in awe of this community of Pleasure Revolutionaries—the Sister Goddesses who have picked me up from the floor several times, dusted me off and cheered me on.

To my guys, who have stepped in to support me, personally, and the team at the Palace in countless ways.

And I am grateful to you. I swear, every time you reach for your pleasure, it makes it way more possible for me to reach for mine. We create new paradigms, together.

Yours in gratitude,
Mama Gena

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