The topic of motherhood makes me sweat.
And twitch.
I feel way more navigational certainty about writing a book than I do about parenting—especially as a single Mom.
But something I have noticed, personally and globally, is this: worrying about parenting only makes your parenting worse.
Why?
Well, worrying, fretting, and doubting (our national hobby, as women) make everything worse.
So, my suggestion for Mother’s Day:
Celebrate every teeny tiny deed that you do for yourself, and for your children.
Why?
Because anything that you celebrate flourishes. Including yourself.
Now, self-celebration is tricky, because for many of us, our own style of parenting is dramatically different from the way we were raised.
And when you are not sure you know the words and lyrics, it is difficult to sing your own praises.
This is your invitation to do it anyway.
Humming your own praises is a good start.
Let me show you how it’s done.
What is it that makes me a good mother?
Well, Maggie was going to a Passover Seder on Saturday with her dad, and then spending Sunday with me. She came home Saturday afternoon, exhausted from a sleep-over the night before at her friend’s house, and I had the presence of mind, in the 15 minutes before her dad came, to throw her in the tub, wash her hair, and get her dressed in the cutest outfit, so that when she came home late, and fell asleep in her clothes, she was already dressed, ready, and clean enough for the second Seder later that day!
Yes! I hum my praises!!!
See, our accomplishments do not have to be great.
Or, maybe, it is about a re-interpretation of what “great” is.
Being a Great Mama is playing with heart. With humor. With passion. With acknowledging your limitations, and not exhausting yourself as you work within them.
Great Mama is being flexible. Easy on yourself, and your kids, such that you still have a chance to enjoy each other.
Great Mama is when you are nurturing and tender and approving and so, so gentle with yourself, whether or not you have kids, whether or not you want kids. Great Mama lives within all of us, and is worthy of being honored.
I am not great at being great.
I tend to err on the side of trying to do everything.
But then, sometimes, with the support of my Sister Goddess Mama Girlfriends, I get reminded that I am so very worthy of celebration.
This community is so precious, so essential to me, to all of us.
So allow me to be your Sister Goddess girlfriend, right now, and let’s hum a few bars, or, who knows, why not sing right out loud about how delicious, gorgeous, brilliant, and hot we are at everything we do?
Even being a Mother.
To ourselves, and others.
Why?
It takes ridiculous amounts of courage to be willing to celebrate she who nurtures, in a world that doesn’t. It takes ridiculous amounts of courage to celebrate oneself, in a world that doesn’t encourage it.
So, as your rebellious, radical, Pleasure Revolutionary act of the moment:
I invite you today, every day, to celebrate every woman in your life who nurtures, tends, and loves, for no reason. Hum for her, for you, sing for her, for you—cut it loose, out loud, full of joy, gratitude, and the outrageous abandon that only the voice of a Sister Goddess, celebrating a Sister Goddess, can create, reverberate, and inspire.
Today I sing for you. Will you join my Hallelujah Sister Goddess Great Mama chorus?
