October 28, 2014

The world was created for this.


You know that feeling. You can feel it right now if you choose. It is a sensation that feels very good inside, like you are sunshine; you are the ripple of wind across the water. It feels sacred. It feels sensual. It feels pleasurable. It feels like the best possible truth. It feels like rapture. […]

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October 21, 2014

It’s worth the risk to FEEL.

MEOLA-148 (1)

Hi. How ya feeling? How many times a day do we get asked that question? And how many times a day do we actually sink into the question, sense, discern and become conscious of the actual way we feel – and then, risk the truth of transparency in our answer? I get to feeling kind […]

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October 14, 2014

When your desire isn’t here yet – focus on this.


Driftwood. Heard of it? At the School, driftwood is what we look for whenever a woman is in the process of conjuring or creating a desire, but the desire isn’t exactly here yet. And – as far as I can tell – this is nearly all of the time. Because there are always desires, and […]

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October 7, 2014

6 Steps to Reinvention.


Hey there, I am the middle of an overhaul. An oil change.* A reinvention. Necessity, she is my mother. My girl is in 11th grade, and she doesn’t need me in the same ways she used to. We are actually going on our first college tour next weekend. I have separated my home and office […]

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September 30, 2014

Say yes to the impossible – here’s how.

mama gena

Let’s dive in. I have something I want to talk to you about. Something I am passionate about, and fierce for. I want to talk about your magic. Your creativity. Your mark. Your way. About how to take a dream and set it on its feet. About how sensual magic works. Magic that every woman […]

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Owning and Operating Men

Welcome to the seventh installment of our 8-week summer series, The Womanly Arts Unplugged, in honor of our upcoming course, Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp! This week, Jane, a Mastery and Creation Grad from Connecticut, joins us to teach about the Womanly Art of Owning and Operating Men!

Jane, Age 78 – Soon-to-be-Author, Retired Family Counselor

jane_wykerWhen I first heard of this Art, I remember thinking, “That sounds a bit manipulative…” — but I learned that couldn’t be farther from the truth! This Art is actually a profound practice in intimacy and connection, stemming from a deep love and respect for men. Mama Gena teaches us how to live into our highest expression, inviting the men in our lives to be their best.

I think of The Art of Owning and Operating Men more like, “The Art of Relating to Men,” or “The Art of Loving and Receiving from Men,” or “The Art of Staying in My Pleasure, Receiving My Desires, and Taking Him Higher”!

You can’t separate your relationships with men from your own personal practice of pleasure. In fact, the crux of the practice is becoming aware of what’s in your pleasure, keeping yourself juicy and happy, and then bringing that to your partner and everyone in your life. The first step in this Art is taking exquisite care of your beauty, sensuality, pleasure and creativity.

That is the way to lead your man and your relationship. In modeling that, you gradually teach him to look for his own pleasure and share that with you. It becomes an upward spiral of joy, connection, and intimacy.

Nearly 7 years ago, when I began my studies at the school, I had one question I wanted answered: “Should I stay in this marriage?”

At the time, my marriage was not working and we were very stuck. Recently retired from a successful business career, my husband, Bob, had little sense of who he was, feeling lost and less. We were not having fun, I was unsatisfied with my sex life, and I was beginning to doubt whether that would ever change.

Through my practice in The Art of Owning and Operating Men, and my coursework at the school, I can now say that at age 78, I’ve never felt more happy, beautiful, sexy and sensual, or deeply connected to my husband than I do right now. Yes, 78! At a time of life when most women of my generation have retired their sensuality, I am proof that there is so much more that’s possible.

Bob and I have been married 28 years, and it’s better than ever. I’m so honored to share some of the most powerful lessons we’ve learned along the way with you today.

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Partying with Your Inner Bitch

Welcome to the sixth installment of our 8-week summer series, The Womanly Arts Unplugged, in honor of our upcoming course, Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp! This week, Jocelyn, a Mastery Grad from New York City, joins us to teach about the Womanly Art of Partying with your Inner Bitch!

Jocelyn, Age 35 – Comedian & Director of Corporate Events

jocelyn_photo_-_editedTo me, The Art of Partying with Your Inner Bitch is the practice of nurturing your inner authority. Your Inner Bitch is the strong person in you that knows what’s best for you and wants you to stand for what will make you happy, and bring out your highest possible self.

We have so many external authorities that tell us who we should be and what we should do. Partying With Your Inner Bitch means you are in touch with your inner boss, who trumps all the “shoulds” imposed upon you. She is one smart cookie, and she deserves to be listened to. She is your higher power, your self-respect, your truth.

Before I go any further, let’s talk about the word “Bitch,” because it can be misleading, to say the least. It’s an insult, the one thing women are taught to avoid being called. However, the Art of Partying with your Inner Bitch gives this taboo word a whole new meaning — a word that can also be read as “Babe in Total Control of Herself.”

Your Inner Bitch is not rude, or cruel at all. She is the antithesis of being a self-sacrificing doormat. Practicing this Art is about feeling in control of your experience, rooted in self-respect; knowing what you want and being unwilling to compromise your standards. In fact, when you truly party with your Inner Bitch, you and everyone around you benefits.

When I came to the School of Womanly Arts in 2008, my Inner Bitch and I were not friends. I was a busy, stressed out lawyer — I was not having a lot of fun, and I was certainly not making room in my life to just let loose and rage. When I found Mama Gena, I devoured her book, went for an orientation session and signed up for her class on the spot. It was such a wakeup call, learning that a woman can own all of herself, and that pleasure can be her modus operandi.

Out of all of the tools and the arts, Partying with Your Inner Bitch is definitely one of my favorites — I can’t wait until we cover it in Boot Camp this Fall. It gives me such freedom and power, and I think the world would be a more peaceful and fun place if everyone mastered this Art!

What happens when a woman is not Partying with her Inner Bitch?

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Owning Your Beauty

Welcome to the fifth installment of our 8-week summer series, The Womanly Arts Unplugged, in honor of our upcoming course, Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp! This week, Mercedes, a Mastery and Boot Camp Grad from New York City, joins us to teach about the Womanly Art of Owning Your Beauty!

Mercedes, Age 38 – Actress, Dancer & Executive Assistant

linderpix-MercedesOwning Your Beauty is about really knowing and loving who you are, your soul, your body, your mind, and every part of you that makes you, YOU.

It’s about accepting your flaws, your imperfections, your inadequacies, and loving all those parts fully.

It’s about feeling your beauty, without relying on what anyone else thinks.

This art has allowed me to put myself first, to love and value myself in the fullest way possible.

Like almost every woman I know, I was never proud of my body. Society, and that nasty inner voice would tell me, “My legs are too big, small chest, my butt‘s not round enough.” I think we’re taught as women to be at war with our bodies, so this Art is really about overcoming all of that, rising above societal standards of “fake beauty,” and really seeing and loving exactly who we are.

This tool allows me to push all of those thoughts, worries, doubts out of my head, and it reminds me how truly divine I am, how special I am, that we are all divine and special, and that we all have something unique to offer. It’s made me accept and love the person I am. Every woman is beautiful.

No matter what size your breasts are, how tall you are, thin you are, old you are — you are beautiful. The Art of Owning Your Beauty is about reclaiming yourself, reclaiming your power, making peace with your body.

Because, when you’re at war with your body, who wins?!

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The Art of Flirtation

Welcome to the fourth installment of our 8-week summer series, The Womanly Arts Unplugged, in honor of our upcoming course, Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp! This week, Laurie, a Mastery and Boot Camp Grad from Michigan, joins us to teach about the Womanly Art of Flirtation!

Laurie, Age 65 – Retired Nonprofit Director

rockstar_cropThe Art of Flirtation is so simple and yet I really tried my best to make it hard. Mama Gena defines flirtation as “enjoying yourself in the presence of others.” That should not be hard to do, right? The problem was, I didn’t understand what true flirtation meant.

I thought flirtation meant that I was looking for a sexual relationship and that flirting was a way to attract men. I pictured old movies where a woman bats her eyelashes and fawns over a guy, telling him all the things she thinks he wants to hear, leading towards some kind of sexual outcome. I never had much time for people who only told others what they thought that person wanted to hear. It felt so fake. I had no interest in flirting and never ever thought I could be good at it, even if I wanted to!

As a gay woman I was even more skeptical of flirting — I was not interested in attracting and flirting with men, and was convinced this was not the Art for me. I thought flirting was all about the other person and making them feel good with no regard for how I felt.

After all that I learned from Mama Gena, the School of Womanly Arts and my Sister Goddess community, I now understand that true flirtation is all about enjoying myself, and uplifting someone else as a wonderful by-product of my flirt.

One thing I love about flirtation is that it just removes so many barriers that we create between ourselves and others. It’s like walking into a room and turning on your light, and letting everyone else bask in the glow. It is plugging into my power source, and attracting everyone in that room who cares to participate in my happiness to join in.

I believe that happiness and flirtation go together. It’s hard not to flirt when you are happy! When I’m happy with myself, and comfortable within myself, I reach out more to people, I uplift them, I do anything I can to bring them into their own power and joy…while taking myself deeper into my own power and joy as well.

There is no room for negativity if one is practicing the Art of Flirtation. Practicing flirtation has removed criticism and fault finding from my life. It has relieved my depression, given me great happiness and allowed so much space for me to attract happier people into my life. Flirting is a win-win situation. No one loses!

Honestly, out of all the things I’ve learned at the school, Flirtation has changed my life the most. This tool has enabled me to stop trying to control the outcome of a situation, and just stay right in the moment and be positive about it. It’s like walking through life with my hands open instead of my fists clenched. It relaxes my body and releases tension. I know that I can find my joy, bring others higher alongside me, and get out of any tough situation by using flirtation.

Every woman has her own style, or brand, of flirtation. How would you describe yours?

rockstar_in_new_yorkI’d say my style of flirtation is humour and empathy.

I always try to lighten up a situation by making someone laugh (and making myself laugh)!

I try to have an awareness about people, sensing when they need to be flirted with. I take so much pleasure in giving someone a compliment and making them smile.

I work with our scholarship program at the YMCA  for low income families, and I remember one woman in particular. She was having a really hard time asking for help, speaking in a very low voice so no one would hear her. She had just lost her job, and things were so rough for her. I smiled and said, “Ok, let’s go sit over here and have a little chat.” That’s flirtation — it’s me paying special attention to her. By the end, we were both laughing. We had formed a mutual admiration society, that just took away all the barriers.

Flirting, for me, is about finding all the rights, and not all the wrongs. Really, there is plenty to find wrong in this world. I flirt with love, I flirt with what’s right…I flirt with babies and I flirt with grumpy people. I flirt with men (I am really good at this) and I flirt with women (I am even better at this)!

The Art of Flirtation is such a joyous, happy tool, and I realized that flirting with anything and anybody is what I am all about. It is the essence of me. It makes me have tears in my eyes talking about it because I so much want everyone to practice this art on a daily basis. Flirting is a life force — my life force.

What are the obstacles to flirting, in your own experience or what you’ve observed from others?

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The Art of Sensual Pleasure

Welcome to the third installment of our 8-week summer series, The Womanly Arts Unplugged, in honor of our upcoming course, Virtual Pleasure Boot Camp! This week, Simin, a Mastery and Boot Camp Grad from the NYC area, joins us to teach about the Womanly Art of Sensual Pleasure…

Simin, Age 38 – IT Director & Artist

Simin headshotPracticing the Art of Sensual Pleasure simply means owning your power.
Sensuality means a lot to me, it is my essence, it is who I am.
My sensual expression is my light, my connection to the divine.
It is the truth that lives in my body and is undeniable.

When I’m regularly connected to my sensual self, everything is different, because I am grounded in myself. I am walking differently, operating in the world with more confidence, feeling calm and relaxed and thus able to express myself clearly. I come from a place of wisdom, I am playful, and turned on. Connecting with my sensuality helps me feel uplifted and to seek guidance when I need it.

The Art of Sensual Pleasure happens for me on three levels. There is the physical level — acknowledging the presence of my sensual self. The emotional level — sensing that I am supported, and held by a deep power within. And at a spiritual level, my sensuality is my wisdom.

Paint us a picture of some of the ways you practice The Womanly Art of Sensual Pleasure in your daily life.

First of all, sensuality is not just about sex. I practice the Art of Sensual Pleasure using all of my senses. I especially use sound, taste, smell, and movement to connect with my sensuality throughout my day.

It’s this practice that helps me stay connected to my divinity and my wisdom, which is so important, especially because I work in computers all day! It’s a very heady job, and if I don’t practice this Art regularly, I can easily get ungrounded and not present.

Here are some examples of how I often connect with my Sensual Pleasure:

  • Fragrances really help ground me and connect with my body. I use pure essential oils often. For instance, I’ll use lavender to calm me — I use it every night, or sometimes when I’m stressed. There is also a particular perfume that really turns me on, and I love to smell it when I’m intimate with my husband.

  • Another way I use smell, as well as the sensual pleasure of beauty, is with flowers. I always keep flowers on my nightstand, for example. When I shop for flowers, I just feel into which bouquet wants to come home with me, depending on what I’m needing. Sometimes it’s roses. Sometimes it’s the fresh feeling of lilies.

  • Then, there’s taste . . . I love flavors. I especially love different flavors bursting in my mouth that surprise me. Taste is so important. Food is a very pleasurable experience for me. It’s also something that I really abused for many years. Because I wasn’t truly connected with my sensuality, I sought instant gratification through sugar and fatty foods. For several years, I was highly dependent on food as my source of pleasure. Now food and taste is just one of many ways I experience pleasure and tap into my sensuality.

  • Music! When I listen to music, it’s like boom, I drop into my body. If I’m very in my head and I’ve had a stressful day, and I feel disconnected, almost like I’m split between head and body, the easiest way I can tap back into my sensual pleasure is to sit at my desk and listen to music. Sometimes I just need to listen to a dark song and move my pelvis — just to feel my connection with my pelvis and my legs and my shoulders. That brings me back and grounds me in such an important way.

  • On a daily basis, I also acknowledge my feminine pleasure center. I will breathe deeply into her, move my hips to awaken my pelvic muscles, and take any action to draw my awareness to her.

  • Another way I really get embodied, feeling connected with my own body and the earth is nature. I love walking in the park, laying and rolling around in the grass. And hugging trees!

For me, practicing the Art of Sensual Pleasure has seeped into so many moments of my day, and how I navigate life.

What can you remember about early messages, or experiences, you received around Sensuality?

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